Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
