1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
