You don't have asthma, your pregnant
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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