Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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