I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
