who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
You brought string cheese to the strip club
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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