Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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