You're my little dorito
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
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he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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