I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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