I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
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