How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
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