do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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