White coat. Heels.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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