Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
high people should be assigned attendants
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
