Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
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