so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
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