the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
