Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
