I didn't shave. On purpose
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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