I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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