David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I supernannyed him into submission
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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