i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
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She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
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a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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