After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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