Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
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Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
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Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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