he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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