Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Randomize
