No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
We need to rekindle our bromance
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
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