Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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