I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
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