Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
