I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
