i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
