I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize