I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
just tell him i said nine months
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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