hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
