My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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