Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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