it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Randomize
