Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i jhust puked up my retainher.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
