Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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