is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
