the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
My pussy is not your playground.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
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