Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
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