I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
