Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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