She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
