i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
