I feel like I'm in dance class right now
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
