your parents love me but you hate me
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
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