I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
You're breaking my sexual little heart
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
