he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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