a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
